Dead Boring.

Once again a bunch of skinny, pale-faced gamers are pulling wishbones, desperately looking out for falling stars and continuing to repeat their pointless mantra, obviously in the misguided belief that if they say it often enough, it will come true.

“Traditional advertising is dead.”
I won'’t say who it is this time or what they’'ve done for that will give them the oxygen of publicity that they use as evidence to suggest that they are absolutely right about everything and that anyone who disagrees with them is just not up with the times. Man.
These morons who have spent all their formative years in darkened, strangely damp, litter-filled bedrooms playing with themselves and growing spots keep insisting that digital advertising is The Word and that anyone who suggests otherwise must be over thirty-five years old.
Despite a plethora of proof to the contrary they keep on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on flogging the same horse that’s not just dead but was boiled, chopped, tinned and happily enjoyed years ago by the nation’'s dogs.
I once worked in an agency with a wonderful creative guy called Rick Cook.
There are a million stories about Rick.
All of them hilarious.
But what I remember most fondly about him was the way he would tell the lamest of jokes and when no one laughed he would wait a while and tell it again.
Then again, then again, then again until after the twentieth or thirtieth time someone would eventually chuckle.
Then we’'d all laugh.
Not so much at the joke – that was still crap – but at Rick’s persistent enthusiasm.
And his silly grin.
Perhaps that’s what these jokers are hoping for.
That if they say the same thing often enough, people will stop thinking they'’re twats and start to believe what they’'re saying.
Well it won'’t happen.
Rick was a nice guy.
He was a charming, talented, genuine people person.
These dweebs who wouldn'’t know how to communicate with any real people who didn’t have a USB port for an arsehole won’'t make anyone accept their embarrassingly tiresome bleatings no matter how long they drone on.
Don’'t they realise how stupid they’re making themselves look?
Traditional advertising agencies aren'’t dead.
Just as digital advertising or whatever it’s called today isn’'t the Holy Grail.
Things are changing.
Everything changes.
But one thing doesn’'t need to be dead for another to survive.
Advertising is and will always be a bit of this, a bit of that.
Sometimes a TV commercial, sometimes a viral.
Sometimes a poster campaign, sometimes a social network programme.
Sometimes produced by someone who enjoys Smackdown.
Sometimes produced by someone who reads books.
It seems like they'’ve become so used to staring at screens blowing cartoons into little pieces with a picture of a gun that they want everything to die.
So give it up geeks.
But not just because you’'re wrong.
Because you’'re boring the tits off everyone.